Intermountain Cup #2 - Hurricane, UT

As if the chaos of moving earlier in the week wasn't enough, I needed to pack for an upcoming race that was only days away now. Holy lord, my head was spinning. I had no idea where anything was, had limited time and really needed to pack and....oh yeah.....and unpack too. How was this gonna work?

In addition I was in the process of getting my new bike all built up by the weekends race. Everything always happens all at once doesn't it? All good stuff this time though!

Revolution Mtn Sports was awesome enough to get my new Felt Nine LTD frame all fresh and built up with my Shimano XTR parts just in the knick of time. Chris Tolsma at Binghams gets a big thumbs up too for getting my rig in and out all measured up to my specifications/measurements at the last minute. Whew, that was a close call.

Here she is in all her glory:


Check out the protective plate. Big flying rox + carbon = bad news bears.



Ok, got the bike so now it is officially time to pack........seriously??? Pack? OMG!!!

I know my bike shoes are somewhere.....Bueller? Bueller?

And I suppose I may find my sports drink at some point too if I am lucky

So 8 hours and tired Kathy later, I had found all that I needed for the weekend and was FINALLY packed for my second race of the season in Hurricane, UT.


Upon arriving on Friday with my new never ridden (NO, not even a pedal stroke - no time!!) I had flatter than flat tires. Yep, doing the jingle jangle with the ole Stans method on some new Kenda Smallblocks at kinda the last minute was the name of the game. Well that and crossing my fingers it would decide to miraculously hold by tomorrow morning. Oh man this was gonna be an interesting weekend.

My only goal became to just feel better/faster than I did at the first race of the season. Not the greatest goal on the face of the earth but lets get real. I was exhausted.

The Pro Ladies line up!

That goal was somehow realized after two mediocre laps and then a 3rd faster lap when the legs decided they wanted to do some work. Got 2nd place in the end.

And, my tires even held up for the most part. I think I might have pumped them up a good 20-30 times before the race in the last 12 hours though. I was pretty obsessive about it. I do know that I only had 18 lbs in the front tire when I got done with the race so it wasn't quite sealed completely yet. But they got me through and are bound to be sealed soon.

The venue


LOVING the 29r. It took about 29 minutes to get used to it too....just as long as it always takes me personally to get used to new bikes. Some people warned me that I may not like the bigger wheels in the corners but it cornered on this particular course phenomenally. For not EVER having ridden one, I am liking what I am seeing!

I nicknamed her "The SteamRoller" as the bike rolls over anything. There is none of this business of looking at a line and thinking there are too many rocks in it and going for the other smoother line instead. With my 29r you see the line you want and you take it - it doesn't matter whats in the way because it will get you there. I couldn't be happier with my new Felt!!!

Moving Day!!

Well so much for racing in that first national mountain bike race in Fontana, CA. It was moving day instead!! Yep, we got the house finally finally finally!!! And we sold our house we had been in for 12 years too. After all this time (many months) it came down to one closing day for both selling our place and buying the new one. Now that is timing.

As if things weren't nutty enough, along with us moving into the new place that weekend we were also holding an estate sale for all my parents stuff in WA. It was a huge weekend of so many mixed emotions both good (new house) and bad (knowing my parents livelihood was being liquidated). Both events were successful though.

So we are officially in and loving it. See picture gallery here of foreclosed wonder that we snatched up from the bank. We have been waiting for this opportunity for years to get the house we were truly after.

View off deck:



Front


We have seen moose already!!!


Taken from side of house

2 Elk just outside the house!

More deck views

More views from deck

Closing Day

Moving 12 years worth of stuff is real super fun let me tell you.

Back of house

other kitchen

Staircase

Kitchen

Living Room/Kitchen

So...yeah, this is why I fell off the face of the earth - packing, unpacking, changing addresses, etc. More updates to come!

Intervals, 1st Race and Houses

This month, now over half done has been a rambunctious one. From training in the snow to being too warm in one layer, packing to move (no we haven't moved yet or even closed for that matter) to having the first mtb race of the year, life has been a handful. It's all good, just busy.

So we will start with the evilness that interval training can be. I haven't done any hard race efforts yet as I am really just getting started with my training after being sick a month. But I have been getting in some sub race efforts. Did I say some? Holy cow I meant a ton. JEE-SUS. My coach was sprinkling them in almost daily working me over each time. The husband was/is getting sick of me crawling up the stairs each night!!

And those sub race efforts are sneaky little devils too because I would hammer out a long effort up a hill starting in the warmer climate and would make my way up to snow by the end. Then I would have to turn around and descend and when I did that I was freezing my tail off. OMG the descent was cold - so cold in fact that I would find myself begging for the recovery time in between efforts to speed up so I could start my next hard effort to get warm! Now that is just sick and wrong but I was freaking cold and wanted to head back up the mountain again so I could get warm again and, oh yeah, start the process all over again. Like I said, those efforts were sneaky little things...having me beg to do the next one which is just flat out twisted.



Next up was heading down to St. George on Friday March 5th for the first mtb race of the season the next day. And on the way down I could feel a nagging, tickle on the top of my mouth that I just chose to ignore.....which as it turns out was a bad idea. I did have my suspicions of course but was trying to will the thought of getting sick away. Chris had been super sick for some time and was just barely getting over it and since I never ever ever get his colds I felt like I was safe. Not this time apparently.

By the time I woke on Saturday for the race I felt like junk. Here we were away from home all packed up, gotta hotel, I was supposed to race, bike was all ready but the engine wasn't. But I really wanted to race still! So I put all logic in a bag, stuffed it under the nasty hotel bed and prepared to race in a few hours. Not the smartest move on the face of the planet but there we were with no place to go except home and I wasn't about to do that. I thought at the very least I will get out on my mtb on dirt for the second time since November. Plus how bad can it really be - its just a head cold?

Ha! What a joke. Between not being prepared for race efforts and being sick I only had one gear during the race. No punch, no kick, no va-va-va-voom, no NOTHING except the desire to sleep. Excellent way to race let me tell you.

Local legend Lynda W smacked it hard to me and took off in front part way thru the first lap leaving nothing for me to eat except her dust. It took everything I could muster up to keep her in site but that was short lived. She was on fire and took the win. I somehow slopped it in for second. KC, Sarah K, and Jen were to follow putting in amazing efforts for this early in the season.


Sarah, some chica in her new Mafia Racing gear, the winner Lynda, KC and Jen Hanks.

All in all though: great race, great friends and great sunny beautiful weather where I got to blind people with my milky white nasty pasty a** legs. Maybe that is what did it....I blinded everyone so bad that they couldn't see the trail to put up a fight as I passed them. Need to work on that tan for sure. SCARE-EE.

For the MTBracenews.com report on the race click here.

Once home from St. George I was able to get rid of the cold which took some time actually. How many times can one get sick in 3 months for the love!? Apparently I am going for the record here. As if I wasn't behind enough in my training already! Good lord. I will be flying come fall though. Ho-Hum.

But I was eventually able to get out and work my way back into hammering myself into the ground again. And to think that was my only goal while sick that I wanted to accomplish! Crazy cyclists! The weather here did take a turn for the better and got warm, getting up into the 50's occasionally. That was nice. Think I had a few days recently that I actually only wore ONE layer head to toe while riding. I like that!


You see the 2 swans? Kinda hard to since they look headless cuz they are hunting!

As for the house........we wait. That is the name of the game in 2010. All banks are dotting their "I's" and crossing their "T's" these days. It is a rough game out there to play right now as you might imagine but we continue to hope for the best.

Oh and my Mafia Racing/Pabst/Felt team was announced as well. Check out the announcement here if you wish.

Next up is heading on over to CA next week for the first big national race that takes place next weekend. Ok, off to train in the wind...

Energy R Us

Someone must have put A LOT of caffeine in my drink yesterday morning because I was on fire ALL DAY. Like a wind up doll that never wound down. First, I got all my errands done in a flash which is pretty much unheard of. Seriously, I had no slow pace yesterday for whatever reason.

And then there was the time on the bike. Holy Cow. By the time I got home from errands I was chomping at the bit to ride. It was beautiful out and I had a long day in the saddle ahead of me which I was psyched about. And the ride, because of this crazy energy that I had, turned out to one nutty ferocious TT. I was ON from minute one......hammering up every little knoll, grinding up grades of 8-12%, winding up the legs after stopping at a stop signs. I just couldn't knock it off or go slow. I have NEVER been like all day long, both on the bike and off the bike and it felt SO GOOD.

Even when I was supposed to be done with my long ride I still felt so good out there that I wanted to keep hammering. Seriously - usually I am ready to be done when its time to call it and this time I was wanting more bike time. So begrudgingly, I went back home and from THE MOMENT I swung my legs off the bike, I was a rubber chicken - could not hardly walk.

It is so weird how you can handle hard race efforts, want more and then the second you stop you realize you really cannot walk after what you just went and did to yourself. Makes you wonder how you just rode and still wanted to ride more when you can't even walk properly now!! Love days like that....except that most of the night I could be found crawling up the stairs. : ) But man, it was a good day! Let's have more of those!!

Winter Update

As we move forward with the purchase of the new house, things have seemingly returned to normal somewhat. Well, that was until one day last week when the underwriter asked us to pay off all our credit cards immediately, prove we did and then CLOSE THE ACCOUNTS and prove that too. This even included paying off and then closing a TINY balance on a clothing store card that I hadn't even gotten the bill for yet!! Gheesh. So that day was crazy with setting up online accounts, paying stuff off, faxing the info off and then shutting things down but that was just a bump in the road. No real biggie.

We are packing up some but don't want to get to ahead of the game in case something falls through. As far as we know, all our ducks are in a row though. We satisfied all their requirements and we should be finding out this week or next when we will close.

In the meantime Chris and I have has been been playing, training and hanging with buddies as much as possible. I love this time of the year when you can do that cuz you are HOME! And this year I have the mental energy to do it too which is nice! What a NEW year this is for me!

Chris Snow Kiting with his buddies.



And here we are with our buddies after several glasses of wine playing our new game, Urban Caving. What is Urban Caving you might ask? Well, just look around your house for the smallest thing and see who can and cannot get into it, on it, under it or thru it.

We started easy with a closet that has shelves that almost came out to the door leaving not a lot of room for a person to squeeze in. We then figured that wasn't enough of a challenge so we moved onto a suitcase.



Kristin fit in just fine! Eric thinks he found a new way to save on airfare.


And we even used a table in the living room. I am still convince that the others could have made it through that bottom shelf. I was actually hoping Chris would get stuck and we'd have to call the Fire Department. That would have been hilarious! But he called it quits before that happened. Dang it! : )



Training has been stellar here in Utah and I have been getting outside almost daily in this beautiful weather we are having. And when I say beautiful I don't mean sunny and warm. I mean dry roads and just bearable enough temperature wise so that you don't freeze your face off.



Trainer days this winter have been so limited that I almost miss them. Yes, you read that correctly. I will be the first to admit that I don't mind the trainer. Nope, not even for 3 hours. I know I know - I am nuts!!! But there is something about not having to deal with dogs, cold air, getting flat tires far from home, snow, cars, etc. that is just plain nice sometimes. A good mental relief from all of that I suppose.

That said, I did take one day to do some testing indoors with Max Testa. I hadn't seen him for an LT Test in a while because last year I just couldn't even fathom taking the time to do that when I had everything going on with my parents.

So I finally went in after a brief hiatus and thought that this could either be really good (happy that I am racing in 2010) or really bad (should have called it quits). I had no idea what the results from the test would be since its been so long since I have tested and my body composition has changed. But both he and I were pleasantly surprised with the results. It is always a plus when Max willingly gives you a thumbs up along with compliments too. But actions on my part speak louder than words...or uh...results. But all signs are pointing to a good season and good lord do I need one of those after last years wrecking ball of one.

The most important thing is that I am back at it and I am happy that I was given a chance to come back to the mtb scene! A big thanks to the Mafia Racing/Pabst/Felt MTB Team!!!!!

This last weekend I also endured some bad news which hit VERY close to home for me. One of my good friends had a parent pass. Seeing friends go through the same basic motions that I had to go through IS SO heart wrenching for me now. So heart wrenching in fact that I find myself super sad and very teary when I get news and updates from people about their ill loved ones. What is up with that? Maybe its that I have a bit of an understanding now of what it is like to be in the process of losing someone and seeing someone go through that literally just rips at my heart now. That is a life journey and experience that I will never ever forgot. And I don't want to forget it either. It gives you sympathy and understanding of what others are facing and that is not a bad thing at all. It is something positive that I gained from a horrendous personal experience.

I think too, maybe I am like this over others experiences partially do to the fact that my wounds from losing my parents are still fresh with dad having passed just 3 months ago and mom just 5 months ago. The wounds are healing but get cut open every once in a while with one thing or another (like getting another Life Insurance letter regarding my moms death in the mail yesterday). Geez maybe that has something to do with not being able to move on without tears??? This is such a process to get through but I am, I will and I will come out a better person (I hope) for it.

As for what's up next?? The first race of the season is just around the corner...... as in NEXT WEEK!!! I am a little behind since I was so sick but I have learned in the last year that you take what you are given and you make it into the best scenario that you can and you can be sure that I will do just that!

New House - New Team

Holy moly have we been going a mile a minute since my last post. Wow, life in the fast lane I guess! But a good fast lane for once!!!

Our house was on the market for just about 2 days, we had 2 showings and we got 2 offers!! It all happened so fast. I guess all the effort we put into staging it was well worth it.

We have since accepted one of the offers and are now under contract for both this house and the one we want to move into in Timberlakes. Timberlakes isn't far from downtown Heber but it is just far enough for it to be a commitment to make the drive to town. But believe me, to live up in the mountains on 1.1 acres overlooking the valley is well worth it and Chris and I are ready for that step. The views are what sucked us in along with the house being exactly what we were looking for too.

The only thing is we have already had what we think was a raccoon chewing on the posts at the front door!! Oh yes, that will be just the start if this thing does happen because the moose, deer, fox and probably lots of other big creatures are ALL over the place up there.

So yeah, so far things are going in the right direction with the buying/selling process: someone seems to want our place, we have found the house that we want to be in forever, inspection of the place went awesome and we have locked in at 4.99%. Yipee! So far so good but it is not a fully done deal yet. I hope it all works out. Actually I don't hope that. I kind of feel like if it is truly meant to be, it will be and if not then it won't and we move on.

Not only have we been doing physical things around the house on a daily basis to either prepare it or prepare to move it, we have had our brains going a mile a minute with offers, counter offers, paper gathering, faxing, phone calls, etc. Yep lots going on and we love it except when the brain won't stop at night!! Its about when I am ready to tear my hair out that I decide getting on the bike will definitely do the trick. It settles my mind and gets it in order again. Thank heavens for that two wheeled invention.

This last training block has been super awesome. Amazing really. I have had to ride inside about once which is unheard of in my book in January/February. It has been a sweet perfect storm of enough snow to keep the ski resorts in Park City moving in a prosperous direction and nice warm temps (well...ok... 30 degrees plus) to melt the snow off the road to allow me to ride outside daily. It has been GREAT.

I have been getting a mix of snowy singletrack, snowy roads


and just the plain old roads in too.


On a few occasions, it has even warmed up enough on some of the snow packed roads to create a massive amount of slush that provides a serious tempo workout just to get through it all.

I really can't believe how "warm" its been this winter. The Jordanelle Reservoir isn't even frozen over yet! Usually it just a sheet of ice at this time.


Here are some pretty cool ice sculptures that are over in Midway. They sit right outside of a destination resort. They are HUGE and you can walk through them!



Well I will say that this "nice" weather couldn't have come at a better time in my life because the thought of having to head down south to train is a nice one, but I just don't have time right now. I am lucky to be putting in big hours outside here for the first time since I turned pro many moons ago. Staying home for the winter isn't half bad I must say.....so long as you can ride outside that is!!

As for my new mountain bike team for 2010 I am SO EXCITED to officially announce that I will be riding for Mafia Racing/Pabst/Felt MTB Team this season. I have been overwhelmed by their commitment to their team members, their organization and their motivation to grow and expand the team and mtb scene in a positive light. I cannot wait to meet all my new team members and be a part of what is going to be a great team this season.

If you haven't seen the story regarding my 2009/2010 season that showed up on mtbracenews.com a few weeks ago you can read it HERE. What a mess my life was last year. Everything seems easy now after that.

Alright, off to get a quick ride in outside, again!! I can't believe this!!

Back to Training

Now that I am not sick anymore, aside from training, I have been doing fun things like catching up with buddies, spoke at the Park City Rotary Club about cycling, signed my 2010 mtb sponsorship contract (TBA real soon!!!) and even saw the movie Avatar. First movie seen in a theater in a LONG time.



Chris and I are even looking for a new house. We are ready to move and our house will be going on the market this week. We are very excited for the next step in our lives. That said, there has been ALOT of cleaning, packing and preparing going on around this house in order to sell but it is fun to think of what lies ahead.

As for training, I picked a great time to get back into things! It has been so nice around here! Well.....34-41 degrees as a high is nice this time of year because it's just enough to melt the snow off the roads and allow for a ride outside.



On a couple of my longer rides this week I went to the natural hot pots in Midway to warm my feet up.



Just stand on the ground for a bit, take in the views for a few minutes and viola, the heat from the ground warms em' up and off you go to finish your ride all toasty as if you had just walked out of the house. I love this place!!



Did my fair share too of poking around to see what is ridable in the area. And lots is, from snow packed roads and trails to the regular road! Amazing!



Also have taken my fair share of falls on the ice. Fishtailing a ton too when slush finds itself in my way of getting from point A to point B. It becomes a good balance and core workout trying to keep the rubber down.....which I don't always do. Gonna make riding dirt a lot easier when the time comes!

And believe me, falling and fishtailing is nothing when I compare it to what I was going through last year at this exact time (dad into a nursing home and mom getting super sick). It is all perspective and life right now.........is good.

You Can Run But U Can't Hide

Holy heck have I been so so so so so sick. I can't believe it. Never ever have I EVER felt as horrible as I had in the last month. Yes, month. I came down with what just seemed like a head cold 2 days after getting back from Cyclocross Nationals (in December!!!!). I tried to train through it a little and it actually seemed to be getting better by Christmas, 10 days later!!! But that is when my body said "enough already, why don't you seem to take the freakin' hint" and overnight it threw me into a tailspin of hot and cold sweats, a fever of 102 and I was in so much pain that I couldn't even roll over without cringing.

I literally drug myself into the doctor the next morning. It took me an hour to get ready because I would put on my socks and have to take a 15 minute rest, brush my teeth, 15 minute rest, etc. It was awful. I still DO NOT know how I drove myself up to Park City in that kind of pain and misery. It was terrible.

They figure it was strep even though that test came back negative. But I had rec'd both a flu shot and an H1N1 shot months earlier so that was ruled out but still could have been a different strain of the flu of course. Got some antibiotics and off I went to fight it. Thanks heavens I am better now because there were certainly times there that I thought I was never ever going to get rid of it.

And now looking back on it, being sick is likely what got me through my first Christmas without my parents. I was home alone the entire day and I didn't care. I was so sick. Even if I had wanted to cry I don't think I would have let myself because it would have added to my misery!

Being sick did allow me to get my life back in order some. I kind of forgot that I have one to maintain too after dealing with the parents estate and all the rest (which we are still dealing with big time). I did manage to see my moms best friend who could not make her Celebration of Life but was in Utah for Christmas. That was a nice but sad affair. It was hard to not start balling the moment I saw her. That said, I did manage to squeeze in some time with friends here and there for the holidays despite missing a fair share of fun as well.

Being sick this whole time I am pretty sure was my bodies way of politely telling me that I can run but I can't hide from all that I have been through. I think this was more than just being sick since I was able to get through the death of 2 parents, training, racing, and traveling all without getting sick AT ALL. I had been going going going since September physically and emotionally and my body was DONE with a capital D.

It had to happen some time I guess. Prior to my parents deaths I was told that people always have to go through a down period to renew, refresh and regenerate after losing loved ones. And even if they try hard to NOT do that the body always comes back to get you to do it. I wasn't trying to get around it, I was just going going going because those were the plans but my body definitely got the last say in that!!

So I am happy to say that I took my last antibiotic this last weekend after being on them for 3 whole weeks and now I need to get my body back in action. I am sure the rest did me some good as trying to add to my fitness while my body was down like that, was not a good idea anyway.

I am now VERY RESTED in all aspects which I apparently needed and can start adding to that. It is nice to be at it again!

Racing Here I Come!

Today I woke up with more motivation than ever to race and continue racing but have nothing solid worked out as far as teams go for the mtb season. Oh boy. Not good.

I can officially say that I have a renewed sense for who I am as a bike racer and for what I need to be doing with my life (racing bikes!!!). It is what makes me happy and Chris is in full support of me going for it again on the mountain bike circuit next year.

And based on my race in Bend, OR I think I can say that I still have it in me on the national level physically and mentally. And when I saw my lap times for that race too, I became SUPER psyched and motivated for next year!!! My best lap times would have put me duking it out in the Top 10 had I started on the 1st or 2nd row (and not the 6th)!! Hello motivation!!!!

I am excited but will need to start looking for sponsors ASAP since that is a process that should be done and over with by early fall. Yeah, I am a little behind you could say, but what's a girl to do...I had bigger fish to fry at the time.

That said, prior to racing US Cyclocross Nationals, I really didn't know what I wanted to do (quit racing or not). Everything with the parents had put me in a really difficult position mentally and physically. I didn't know who I was, what I was doing or what I was feeling. I was going through the motions of torment and trying to push through the best I could hoping that something inside me would twinkle and give a sign on what direction I should go.

In the meantime I just did what I always do which is train and race.....well.... in between planning funerals and saying good bye to my parents for the last time. Riding, racing and training was what kept me "grounded" even though I was far from it.

I lost my sponsorship right after my parents Celebration of Life with my 2009 mtb team. Was that a sign that it all needs to end and that I need to move on? I have never lost a sponsorship before in my life. What kind of sign was this? What was my mind telling me? What was my body telling me? I honestly didn't know. So I did nothing about it. I didn't make a call, nor did I send out any resumes to find teams. I had no idea what I wanted to do so how could I?!!! I was still anxiously waiting for that sign.

What I did know at the time was that I shouldn't make any rash decisions about leaving the sport that I have loved forever. You are in such a weird emotional state when you have lost not one, but both parents in 8 weeks time. And they had been sick the entire year, which for me was emotionally draining. A drain that I took into every race with me in 2009. Ok, yeah you are supposed to be a professional and suck it up (which I did to race) but my performance suffered. And while going through all of this was NOT the time to make big crazy decisions about your own life. Potentially throwing everything away! Waiting for the dust to settle was truly in my best interest and I knew it but I wished it would have just settled faster!!!!

On one particular day I remember vividly deciding THAT WAS IT and it was over, I wasn't going to race at Nationals in Bend or at anything ever again. I was done and that was ok.

ANNNNND......4 hours later I called my coach back and said it's on like donkey kong, I am going to Florida to train (not just enjoy a vacation) and I am heading to nationals too. I was going to do this thang!

Can you say flip - flop?

Yeah, that is what you call a roller coaster ride and it went on for months like that in my head. I was just waiting for a sign the entire time. You know, that something inside of you that says YES this is the direction you want to go and it is ok if you do?

Well I finally got that!! And at least that part is over now and I know exactly what I want to be doing with my life. I am ready, able, willing and I can't wait!!! I fought all year long and I am not about to give in now!

I was waiting for that light bulb moment and I finally got it in December!!! I will be back next year to race mtb and cyclocross!!!

What a good feeling to know what I want again! Now it is time to find someone that can support that cause..........so late in the game. Ugh.

Heading Home

After going to Trader Joes in Bend (YES!!!) I decided to do the full circle car tour and go on US 26 to Portland this time. What a gorgeous drive!

Everything on the drive at first started out sunny and dry.

But it all changed at about one particular mile marker as you started to ascend into the depths of winter.



It was no different than going the other way other than it was a tad faster.

I passed another resort that my family checked out way back when, called Kah-nee-tah. Good memories there too. And again, I had no idea where it actually was in Oregon, I just knew we went there for a family vacation a few times when I was a kid. It was fun to think about as I drove by the turn off for it.

I also passed the road to Timberline Lodge. That is where my parents spent their honeymoon after getting married in WA. I was tempted to go have a peak at it but I didn't know how good or bad the roads would be going to it so I left that journey for another day.

My uncle actually recounted a funny story to everyone at my mom and dads Memorial Service in November about their honeymoon. Apparently my parents headed off in the car from the church they were married in and my dad forgot his wallet!!! He had left it with my Uncle and had forgotten to retrieve it as planned before leaving on his honeymoon. And back in the 50's there were no credit cards! Knowing that it was imperative my dad got his wallet before heading to Timberline Lodge my Uncle went to great lengths to get the wallet back to him, which he somehow and someway did. A cute little story I thought I would share here, one in which made me smile big upon remembering it as I drove by headed for the airport.

I am glad I went 2 different ways getting to Bend and then leaving Bend - it has served as some WONDERFUL vivid memories of how lucky I was to have my parents as my parents! God bless them both.

US Cyclocross Nationals - Bend, OR

When you expect nothing, sometimes you get SOMETHING. This was a good race for me. I didn't know what to expect, got to the venue, horsed around long enough to not get a full warm up in - nice and then raced my pants off.

What truly was I expecting from today?? I was starting on the 6th row, hadn't raced with any of these women since mountain bike season and here I was having missed about a month of training in the last 3 months and had no idea what my fitness was like or where my head stood against racing with the nations best. I wanted to race and do my best but who was to know how that was really going to turn out!

The course hadn't changed much from the day before except that a lot of the snow and slush had melted leaving some nice tacky track.

We lined up with me feeling so far back from the front row that I felt like a sardine (there were girls lined up behind me believe it or not!). It was great to see everyone again I must say too! I missed everyone this whole season while dealing with my life tragedies. Oh and a big thanks to Darrell Davis who was kind enough to take and carry all my nasty warm up clothes while I raced. Details, details. Ok, they weren't that nasty cuz remember...I kind of botched up my warm up.

So my whole goal today was to just move up in the pack and get as far up there as I could.....if I was fit enough against these girls to do that. So much was running through my head but overall I was pretty calm considering today was a total crap shoot.

The gun went off and I got a mini nap in before our row was ready to hit it hard for 40 minutes. And at that moment I started with a vengeance and let-er-rip!

I felt surprisingly really good out there and was so happy to be working my way through the group of 87 women with each lap. I honestly couldn't believe it. As I passed people it gave me even more fuel to gun it harder. On the stairs I felt like I was gliding up them effortlessly and I was able to ride the "ride up" with more ease than normal.

I had worked my way around about 5 girls during that particular lap and was ready to pass the next one on the ride up and she fell over into me, knocking me down and off my bike! They got a picture of it here. I didn't get all bent out of shape about it as we untangled the bikes. But as the others passed us it was going around in my head that I was going to have to re pass all of them the next lap again. Rats!!!! But that is racing for you.

When the last lap was called as "one to go" I was extremely disappointed because I still had lots of work to do, I was having A BLAST and I was getting places in the pack!! I have never felt like that on the last lap either....usually you are wanting that last lap to come sooner rather than later and not delay it!

I finally crossed the line in 21st. No, not a top 10 but a great way to start and end the season all in one day.

That night it was all about drinking wine and packing up for my flight out of Portland the next day. This cute little deer even stopped by our house to say hi.

Bend, OR

Holy cow it was bit stressful getting to Bend, OR. I flew in Friday night and started driving to the venue at the crack on Saturday in order to pre-ride the course at 12 noon. Race is Sunday.

Luckily I saw that there was weather coming in so I timed it all accordingly getting a super early start. But I missed the memo about the black ice on I-5.

Hmm, why is everyone driving so slow as I wizzed by each car going 70mph. Didn't find out the answer until I went to get onto OR-22 which would take me up and over the mountain pass on into Bend. Yeah - NO BRAKES. I slid and it was scary as I almost hit the cars ahead of me. Awesome......only 10 minutes into my 4 hours journey across the pass to Bend. I'd better take a deep breath now and settle in for quite the drive all by myself!

The first hour was hair raising and it was an exercise of how calm I could keep myself and how I could keep my heart rate from spiking. I seemed to be almost the only toolbag on the road in this inclement weather and the roads were covered with ice. Apparently I should have studied the news a bit more than I did.



And my car even got some freshies at the top of the pass. By then time I hit Sisters, the weather was in a better place and so was I - a lot calmer.

I passed Black Butte Ranch on the way over and it brought nothing back but memories of me and my parents having a family vacation there almost every year when I was a kid. I never really knew where it was in OR until that moment. It was nice to think about all that. I definitely carry my parents very close to me in my heart and I am sure they knew they were being thought of at that very moment. They were so great and wonderful and I really do miss them.

Actually a lot of the drive reminded me of Scotland. It was so lush and wet outside. And you were driving along a road that had water on the right and nothing but a steep mountain on the left. It was beautiful!

So I got to the venue safe and sound with time to spare and jumped right on course. It was fairly warm out at around 30-35 degrees.

There had been a lot of talk about how much snow and ice there was but there wasn't a lot by the time I got there on Saturday. It had melted over that last few days and left some snow packed stuff, some slush and even some dry areas.

The course was great and very mountain bikey. Lots of fun with one pretty good off camber steeper descent with a sharp turn at the bottom. Nice!! There was what was likely going to be a run up if it rained but for now it was a "ride up." A great set of barriers sat right outside the beer tent and a lovely set of stairs made for a good jaunt in the park with your bike on your back. Other than that, you had your standard course....lots of turns, some muddy some dry, some slushy, little steep uphills with quick and fast down hill sections too, etc.

Afterwards I went and picked up my number at registration and was given the number 60. Yep, 60th call up. And what did I do??? I immediately got the to condo I was staying at with my teammates and put it on as #09 (a # that I saw a lot of in 08).

Oops - just wishful thinking I guess and also just a good reminder to myself that I was going to have my work cut out for me tomorrow!

Utah Cyclocross Race #11 - Ogden, UT

I was thinking WAY too much for my own good during this race. You can see it on my face!!


So I go from beautiful Florida to snow in Utah. It was expected but it is always a bit of a shock to the system when you go from 70 to 20 degrees.

Once I got to the race venue today I don't know what bee got in my bonnet or....er...um...helmet.... today, but I was a mental wreck when I saw the snow on the course. I totally freaked out. Seriously, I don't know why I was being so weird about it because it is plain and simple:
there was a race
it was snowing
there was ice on the course and
I had to race it



Pretty simple concept really so why was I FREAKING? Maybe I like my limbs and body very intact. Having an unscathed body is nice. Perhaps that was it.

Racing on ice is a bit unnerving hopefully for anyone so maybe I should give myself some credit here but good lord girl.....GET on your bike, ride it, race it and go home. Again a simple concept that I couldn't quite grasp.

Was it that I was still in the middle of wrapping up a 1000 things from my parents death now that I was back from our trip? Was it that I was inundated with things that aren't a normal part of ones life and I am learning how to cope with that? Was that it? Why was I not mentally ready for this race?!

I still don't know. All I know is that I had to accept the way I was feeling and deal with it the best way a so called pro knows how to.......hmmmm, yeah. I felt like I reverted back to when I first started racing and everything was scary to me because it was all so new. What the??

I wanted to leave. That is how I was feeling. I almost did but every last bit of me fought off that urge. My concern at this point was if I am not mentally in a good spot to be here and racing, then should I be? Am I putting myself even more in harms way by starting a race that I was skeptical of starting? Oh good lord! But if I left, what would that teach me? For me on that day, no good could come from leaving.

What a freaking struggle!! Well, struggle = my life this year so why stop fighting with my life now??? It is December after all which means that I have been dealing with crap happening with my parents for a full year now.

I am staying and I am starting dang it!!!!!!!!!!

I don't run away from things and I am not about to start now!! Plus, what doesn't kill me will make me stronger right?

So I started the race.

I conveniently (NOT!) started on the 2nd or 3rd row back. I think that was my subconscious ringing in on my hesitation of racing on the snowy and icy course.

And once the gun went off, I took forever and a day to get to the front of the group. Again, all hesitation. I was fighting with everything I had mentally (because you can't go that hard on snow and ice) to get to the front. Why was this so difficult I would ask myself. Just trust the bike - trust yourself!

Bam!! I eat crap on a icy corner. Land on my head facing backwards on course as everyone that I had just danced around to pass closes the gap again. I get back up completely fine and continue to daintily jockey my bike around the course, tip toeing through the corners and punching it on the straight aways. I needed to get to the front!!

But some of those straightaways has consequences. You hit the deck and slide and you are sliding off the path and down a ravine in some spots. Yeah, doesn't sound fun to me either but you had to punch it where you could otherwise you never would!

Still thinking far too much here in this pic. Just be, just DO!


I started taking more chances and gained confidence on the snowy course. I start to remind myself that I am not a complete tool and I do know what I am doing (how quickly we forget!).

Then swoosh I go WAY off the course and into the trees. So much for taking THAT chance. Whoops! I was ok, just had to go chase everyone down again.

I finally get to the front where Sara Kaufmann is having the race of her life leading the thing.

What it came down to in the end? Who made the least mistakes. And I guess that was me although I felt like a walking mistake from the moment I got to the venue.

What a weird day mentally. And physically too because you can't actually race at your race pace on this stuff- maybe in certain sections yes, but otherwise you had to be careful!

I am going to try and take away a positive thing from today which was that I did not give into my fear and it worked out.

What did I learn? That I can do it and that pushing through your fears can be a good thing!

And I got in some GREAT practice today too. Having to pass a lot of girls today will definitely be good for next weekend in Bend, OR at cross nationals. There I will start in 60th position (about 6 rows back) out of 90 plus women since I have no points and will need as many mad passing skills as I can get.



I heard it is snowy up there too. Am I scared?

Not now!